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Painting Essay 创 / 作 / 随 / 笔 ∷ 画画最吸引我，让我又爱又恨的地方就是其过程永远存在不确定性， 常常“无法预料”或者“出乎预料”。这不正像现实中的生活吗？ ∷ 比起完成的作品，画画的过程更加吸引我。 或许是因为画中的气息愈来愈靠近我自己——我总是希望我的展开

Painting Essay 创 / 作 / 随 / 笔 ∷ 画画最吸引我，让我又爱又恨的地方就是其过程永远存在不确定性， 常常“无法预料”或者“出乎预料”。这不正像现实中的生活吗？ ∷ 比起完成的作品，画画的过程更加吸引我。 或许是因为画中的气息愈来愈靠近我自己——我总是希望我的画无论从出发点，还是过程、结局， 都像是我心理活动轨迹的折射和记录， 使内心活动、画画的过程以及生活的真实体验能三位一体。 ∷ 有的画，我动作极快，几乎是酝酿在胸，一吐为快，一气呵成。 但更多的时候，一幅画，我会画很多遍，每一遍都是从头开始的心态和办法， 每一遍都是对前一遍的破坏、修改或重建。 ∷ 画画是最为有趣的游戏方式。 在这个自我游戏的过程中，我在现实中的迷惘和沮丧得到了一次又一次短暂的释放； 对身与心，意识与潜意识，幻想和希望，存在与虚无， 自然与人生等等一系列复杂的精神矛盾的思索也得到了一次又一次暂时的化解。 ∷ 绘画的技术、语言没有止境。 新的题材、新的表现对象，需要有新的更适合的技术语言去适应。 所谓创作，更多时候是心灵探险史，和手上的技术语言战斗，不断地和自己过不去。 ∷ 艺术家的创作演变过程实际上是精神演变的呈现。 在艺术创作行为中，艺术家的精神形态决定着艺术形态，决定着艺术图像的呈现方式。 艺术家的创作活动是一种有意向（指内心世界）的活动。 画家的意向确定画什么以及如何画。 所以，对于观众来说， 要了解作品就需要通过画家的创作意向（内心、思想、希望、恐惧等等）， 从作品中读出投射进去的意义。 ∷ 绘画创作大多时候是很私密的，个人化的，是靠自成一体的精神世界来支撑的。 这是创作的生命之水。碰不碰上主流，或者永远就是孤独地流动，或者积成一片湖泊， 又或者流向大海，这水都是我的生命之水。 它遇到别的水，可以是愉快地融为一体，也可以是打过招呼后各流各的。 总之，它自然流淌，无法强求。 它提醒我不要丢掉自己绘画的“本心”，时常叩问自己：“我还是我吗？” ∷ 创作，就是先制造一堆问题，然后一个一个设法解决掉。 创作过程中，常冷不丁就遇到无以为继的瓶颈。 而且，这种状况通常不是通过努力就可以找到解决办法的。 答案和线索或许就在生活的哪个细节中。 等待，沉淀、冥想，任由疑惑进入潜意识中秘密运作， 一旦进入了一种饱满的创作状态， 生活细节中的任何一个点都有可能触动灵光闪现，冲破迷雾。 ∷ 每天我画画的思绪就像一只随风飘舞的风筝。 我的感性和兴趣点就是风筝，而我的理性和目标就是风筝线。 有时候，风筝也会跌落下来。 这时候，我要做的事就是想办法调整理顺风筝线，让它重新飞舞起来。 ∷ 对于一个艺术创作而言，最重要的是有一个好的状态。 这个状态包括心态和身体，即身体健康，心态平和，思维活跃，身体无挂无碍。 这样就有利于形成一个良性循环的气场。 ∷ 一花一世界，一人如一花。在这个世界上，每一个人每一个生命都如同一朵花。 我生命中的大部分时光，都在忙于自我培育，自我灌溉，自我成长， 就是为了让自己这朵花终能盛开。但是，我不会停止自己欣赏别的花朵的脚步。 绽放自己，欣赏他人，正如“好之者，不如乐之者”。 我们这个世界，有多少个人，就有多少朵花，当然是万种风情。 有的花是专供欣赏的，有的可做药用，有的可泡茶（菊花茶，桂花茶等）， 有的可做毒药，还有的可当食物……云云种种，真是各有各的使命。 而我呢，甘愿守住我心中的沃土，做一株快乐的、迎风的、静静吐露芬芳的茉莉花。 ∷ 有人说我的画风变化太快，是不是阶段性多种尝试的呈现。 这样的说法也是可以接受的。但是，我仍有一种质疑：什么是阶段性？ 阶段性未必是一种默认目标结果的信道。易经讲：“人生就是阶段性的调整。” 在我看来，阶段即分号，我的人生永远是此阶段连着彼阶段， 一生就等于N个阶段相串联，它们之间也许相融，也许相异。 ∷ 梵高、毕加索是否思忖过普通人能否毫无困难地欣赏他们的画？ 我认为一个艺术家无需向自己提出这类问题。 要是我们力图使自己迎合一般读者的理解力，那就完蛋了！ ∷ 我的创作过程就好比在经营一个大植物园， 根据土壤、环境、气候条件来培育不同品种，它们各有生命，却又相互关联， 形成良性循环的一种生态。 我就好比是一个园丁，每天都要打理我的园子，勤劳地培育灌溉， 这种持续的劳动就是一种状态。 我一旦进入全方位的状态，就像打通了全身每一个神经细胞，随时都会产生奇思妙想。 而一旦“状态”被破坏，就好比停止了灌溉，空气遭到了污染， 植物就会缺失营养，受到伤害， 最终导致夭折。 ∷ 创作这件事对于我，不再是为了表现自己， 或者为了展现什么，成就什么，贡献什么，索取什么…… 只为了真真实实地体会感悟每一刻握在自己手中的时间， 为了释放发乎于自身真实的气息和语言。 不要伪饰，犹如一团星火，既达到燃点，便尽兴猛烈燎原。 ∷ 我认为自己在时间的财富上算得上是个大富翁。 因为我每天都拥有整整的24小时，我可以任意支配1440分钟。 而在支配这笔天赐财富时，我希望自己是吝啬的， 吝啬到不浪费每一分钟。 ∷ 长久地一个人独处，画画，读书，写东西， 使自己处在一种长期面对自己的内心的境地。我似乎是在与死亡并肩前进， 我时刻能感觉到时间在与我争夺年华，而我无能为力， 我感到了自己的卑微和渺小，甚至是微不足道。 是不是所有貌似坚定的理想与意志之后，最终的驱动力， 都是生命中无法填补的虚无呢？ 与独处相伴，我已无法回头。 因为这是治疗对走向死亡的大悲凉的唯一处方。 对于死亡，我似乎已不怎么恐惧了， 因为我意识到了一个生命的卑微和弱小，更何况只是几幅画，一个展览呢。 精神的药丸而已。 ∷ 对于自己的创作，任何旁人的意见我都持可听可不听的态度。 原因是：现阶段我的艺术就如同大象的零部件，尚未完全成“象”， 所以还不到让别人来评头论足的时候。 再则，旁人来批评指点我那正处在成长期的艺术，都有盲人摸象之嫌。 正确的态度是：任何从左耳进的批评和建议，都是经过我的大脑过滤， 好的就“落肚”，不好的从右耳出去。 重点还是自己去思考。 正如西洋古语所说：“你能引马就水，但不能教马喝水”。 （You can lead a horse to water, but you cannot make him drink） ∷ 《独•舞》创作阶段，我基本上是追求见山是山，见水是水，以实物传情。 《游•戏》创作阶段，我开始追求见山不是山，见水不是水， 我只是藉“山”借“水”，把思绪编织在形式、线、色、空间、运笔气韵的配合、安排中。 ∷ 什么叫做好画？我觉得我自己现在的作品离逸品、神品还有很大的距离要跋涉。 当一切理性的知识也好，技术素养也好， 全部融化成我身体内外的每一个细胞时，它们能自主地调遣我的感性， 我要做的就是自然而然地散发我的生命力， 这个时候产生的作品，才是我的好作品！ ∷ 任何的阅读经验，以及前人古人别人的理念和观点、体验， 不可能替代自己手上的实践以及自己独立的思考。 但前人的经验和作品可以是一扇门，一块跳板， 通过这扇门，我可以到达另外一座花园。 决不可被教条的第二手经验和他人的思维来缚住自己的直观感受， 否则尚未进入自己的花园，便死在门外。 ∷ 画画不易，画出好作品极难。 因为画画的主体是一个精神世界， 大多数的时候，诸多内心情感或者思省，都是个人内心的自生自灭。 生命的情思是虚的，无形的， 而画画就是要把这无形变幻成有形的可视形象、色彩。 换句话说，就是要把自己的心（艺术家净化后的心）给画出来。 这能不难吗？ ！ ∷ 艺术的本质是一种无中生有，一种虚无的东西。 师承和创新在我这里就好比蜜蜂酿蜜。 我酿造的是“百花蜜”， 古今中外前人的成果就如花团锦簇的百花园，又像天空闪烁的繁星。 我如蜂蜜般辛勤地采集花粉，在自己的“花房”里发酵， 从自己的性之所近的形形色色的花朵中寻求新的灵感之源， 希望酿成自己的独门“百花蜜”。 ∷ 现阶段是要回到绘画的本体纯粹性问题上来。 这种纯粹性就是指构成作品各种元素的纯粹绘画性， 以及各种元素所隐含的个性力量和精神指向。 ∷ 无论是人物、植物，还是动物、市井生活， 都是我画笔下的“猎物”，都是作为一种生命的表情加以表现。 无论动态的还是静态的， 我都极力想赋予它们生命的情思、音乐的韵律、舞蹈的抽像以及游戏的乐趣。 我视之为作品的精神之线。 ∷ 成为“名人”的渴望、渴求公众的认可， 或许是最能扼杀画家的工具。 因为绘画的魅力只在于其本身。 绘画有思想性，但不该是绘画要先承担它。 两回事。 ∷ 画家真正的含义是什么？ 我觉得是快乐地画画，踏踏实实地做人，平实地生活。 让灵魂清澈，令大脑智慧。 画画是我的游戏之一。 孔子说“游于艺”，说白了就是“玩”。 不过，这个玩不是浪费时间浪费情感的那些玩，而是要玩得高明。 比如说， 画画是一种，IT工程师是一种，西点蛋糕师是一种，野生动物专家是一种， 设计师是一种，舞蹈家是一种，农民是一种，家庭主妇也是一种，还有很多很多。 只要玩得认真投入，便会乐趣无穷。 我觉得绘画最后让我悟出来的有一样就是画画应该是真诚的，快乐的。 再苦再累再清贫，都没什么要紧。为什么，因为实在玩地很有趣。 人的生命，过一天就短一天，我一定要享受我的人生。 怎么享受呢？ 画画，读书，思考，生活。 ∷ 守得住孤独才守得住艺术的纯粹。 孤独是空山无人，水流花开；是一弯冷月，天空高悬； 对艺术应该有一种坚持，让自己简单一些，纯净一些。 ∷ 现实生活头绪繁多，情绪和思考都变化莫测， 如果再以《独•舞》的手法去创作， 就意味着要把自己的思绪、感情、知觉、错觉锁定在相应的状态上， 这对目前的我来说，就会变成情绪的煎熬。 而顺应情绪、思考的变化和发展，使之融入线条、色彩的编织之中，顺其自然，随心而创造。 突然的情绪，心灵的危机，都是作画的理由。 ∷ 绘画创作的过程于我自身来说，其作用远远大于作品的最后结果。 打个比方：父母孕育孩子，养育孩子， 与孩子共同成长，相互作用的过程，对父母生命的影响作用大于孩子长大成人离家之后。 长大成人的孩子走入社会，有了他自己的命运， 留在父母心里的，更多时候只是一种铭心的念想和牵挂。 过去我画画，对作品最终结果的重视多于过程。 而现在，绘画的过程，却是真真切切在和我共同成长， 是一种岁月，一种思想的沉沉浮浮的记录或像征。 这种创作的过程，几乎成了我画画的个人意义的全部， 而当作品最终完结（姑且认为画完了吧）的那一刻， 就如同“我的孩子成年后的离去，开始他自己的命运”的时刻。 这个时候，我对我亲手创造出来的“孩子们”要做的只有一件事， 那就是放手，回忆和欣赏。 ∷ 在这个信息爆炸、多元文化超级迅猛的不安分的时代， 作为个体来说，你可以选择求变，顺应，体验，也可以选择退而坚守。 无论选择何种态度，都是一种思考的结果，重要的是要自己喜欢。 目前的我仍然坚守在传统手工绘画的阵地里，旁观周遭的变化发展， 而所有的观察和旁观结果，会间接呈现于我的笔端。 或许一切的现象、人和物都可成为我笔下的猎物。 想一想这样的绘画生活都觉得好玩、有趣。 ∷ 总体来说，我画画的速度是很慢的，究其原因还是我太用“心”。 几乎所有的画作，都与我的内心共同生活、变化、沉浮。 我无法让手中的画笔脱离内心情感情绪而为其他理由行动。 画笔听命于我的心，一颗时而动荡时而宁静的心。 ∷ 油画、彩墨、纸本、涂鸦、线描，一脉相承，一母所生，手段面貌各异而已。 对于题材，不做作，不刻意，顺心自然，该局限就局限，若细微平凡就不去好大喜功。 心随生活，笔墨随心。 ∷ 我时常会在小本上记满自己的探索过程： 不仅有记录生活的速写，还有追忆自己生命体验或奇思怪想的默写， 也有因自己强烈“内心需要”而“有感而发”以表达朦胧的意象的草图， 以便把形式语言的摸索深入到各种内容和对象中去。 ∷ “生如夏花之灿烂，逝如秋叶之静美”。 在艺术世界里，我尊敬和喜爱那些不计较荣辱得失，不在乎普世名利价值， 为自己的梦想而“燃烧”自己，燃烧自己的生命去换取一个在现实世界中很难被认同的价值， 存活在“奉献”的信仰里的艺术家。 他们不怕被人视如草芥，只愿在自己的美好王国中驰行。 ∷ 用理想和信念来支撑自己的精神；用平和宽容来看待周围的人事； 用知识和技能来改善自己的生活；用理性和判断来避免人生的危机； 用主动和关怀来赢得别人的友爱；用激情和毅力来完成自己的梦想； 用严厉和冷酷来改正自己的缺点。 ∷ 净化自己，充实自己的内心，让技术融化，让自己的作品充盈着令人不能忘怀的气息， 每一条线，每一块色，都呈现出自己内心的希望。 凝聚自己所有的热情和力量在画上， 因为这块“土地”是踏实的，诚实的，肥沃的，有潜力的，值得我倾情倾力去耕耘。 净化自己，一步一叩首，去追求艺术的纯粹、极致。 ∷ 京剧、昆曲本身就是集诗、歌、舞、戏、服于一体的艺术形式。 我对戏曲舞蹈的绘画尝试，不是要去刻画历史故事，或演绎舞台剧目， 而是让这一综合艺术样式中的某些传统元素在我现今的生活方式里得到一种激活， 在画中追求一个意象，一种韵味，一种情怀。 ∷ I am most fascinated with painting. What I love and hate about it is the ever-present uncertainty in the creation process, where results are often "unpredictable" or "unexpected." Isn't life in reality just like that too? ∷ Compared with the finished work, I am more fascinated with the process of creating it. Perhaps it is because the atmosphere in the painting draws me closer and closer as it materializes — I always want my painting to be a reflection or a record of the track marks of my mental activities, throughout its birth, progress and completion. I want my painting to be a triune of my spiritual activities, the process of a painting and the experience of realistic life. ∷ Some paintings took me no time to complete; they were conceptualized in my heart, and I would put them down on the canvas at one sitting. But more often, I would paint and re-paint a picture again and again, each time starting from scratch both in terms of my mentality and approach, and every time it would be a deconstruction, modification or reconstruction of the previous version. ∷ Painting is a most interesting game. In the process of playing against myself, I achieve temporary respite from the confusions and frustrations in reality again and again. In the same manner, I enjoy momentary resolution again and again from the tangle of complex and conflicting thoughts — about mind and matter, consciousness and subconsciousness, fantasy and hope, existence and nothingness, nature and life. ∷ Creation, is to create a bunch of questions first and then proceed to solve them one by one. During the creating process, there will be times when you are suddenly hit with seemingly insurmountable bottlenecks. Moreover, such situations are usually not overcome with sheer effort. The answers and clues may be contained within the details of life. One needs to wait, accumulate, and meditate allowing the doubt to work its mysterious wonders in the subconscious mind; once the mind reaches a state of saturation, any bits of the details of life could trigger flashes of inspiration, and bring about breakthroughs. ∷ There are no boundaries to the techniques and languages of art. New inspirations and subjects of expression need to be realized through new and suitable techniques and languages. Creation is more of a journey of my spiritual explorations, a struggle against the existing techniques and languages, a constant tug-of-war with myself. ∷ The artist's journey of artistic evolution is actually a manifestation of his mental evolution. In his acts of artistic creation, the artist's mental state will determine the form of his art and how he presents images artistically. The artist's creation activity is one that is intentional (in his inner world). The artist's intention determines what he draws and how he draws. The audience, then, needs to understand the artist's intention (emotion, thought, hope, fear, etc.) before they can appreciate his works and read into the meaning that is embodied within these works. ∷ The creation of paintings is usually very private and personal, and is sustained by the self-contained world of the artist's psyche. This is the fountain of life of creation. No matter if it merges with the mainstream, or is always flowing in solitude, or consolidates into a lake, or empties into the sea, this fountain is the wellspring of my life. When it meets with other streams of water, it can blend with them readily, or it can also greet them cordially before going separate ways. In short, it flows naturally and cannot be forced. It reminds me not to lose my "inner self" about painting and often prods me to ask myself, "Am I still me?" ∷ To see one world in a flower, we also need to realize that every person is like a flower. In this world, every person or living thing is a flower. I spend most of my life busy caring for self-nurturing, self-nourishing, and self-improving, hoping that the flower within us will eventually blossom. However, I will not stop myself from appreciating others' flowers. To allow myself to blossom while being able to appreciate others is to live according to the saying, "The person who desires is a lesser being than one who enjoys. " There are as many "flowers" as people in this world, which make our world multi-hued. Some flowers are good for display, while others are used in medicine, tea leaves (like chrysanthemum tea and osmanthus tea), poison, food ... such profusion yet each having its own little mission. As for me, I prefer to nurse the fertile soil that is in my heart, and to be a happy, breeze-loving jasmine, quietly perfuming the air with my fragrance. ∷ Every day, my thoughts about painting are like a kite flittering about in the wind. My emotion and interest are my kite, and my reason and goal are the kite line. Sometimes, the kite will drop from the sky. In such moments, all I need to do is to think of ways to untangle the kite line, so that the kite will be up and flying again. ∷ For a practitioner of art, the most important thing is to be in the right state. This includes his state of mind and body, which means staying physically and emotionally healthy, having peace of mind, being mentally active, and be worry-free about his body. All these are conducive to the formation of a benign energy field. ∷ Some people say my style of painting changes too fast, that I am now at the stage of trying out different styles to find my own. I can accept this observation. However, I wish to respond with this question: What is this concept of "stages"? Having stages may not indicate having a pathway to a predefined target or result. According to the Yi Ching, "Life is about making adjustments in stages." In my opinion, stages are like semicolons, and my life is filled with stages linked to other stages. One's life is a series of interconnected stages; some of which may be complimentary with another, while others may perhaps be different. ∷ To me, creation is no longer about expressing myself or to show something, to achieve some goals, to make some contribution, or to receive something in return... It is simply about truthfully experiencing or realizing every moment of time that I have, in order to set free my true spirit and internal language. Do not try to hide or mask yourself, but rather, be a mass of sparks that, once ignited, will burn fiercely and thoroughly. ∷ Did Van Gogh or Picasso ever mull over whether ordinary people were able to easily appreciate their paintings! ? I do not think an artist needs to ask himself such ques-tions. If we try to pander to the general public's understanding of our art, all is lost! ∷ I liken my creating process to managing a large garden, in which I cultivate different varieties of plants based on the condition of the soil, environment and air. Each plant is its own, yet it is interrelated with others, forming a benign cycle within an ecosystem. I am like a gardener who tends his garden everyday, industriously cultivating and irrigating the plants. This ongoing labor becomes a "state." Once I am in the right state in all aspects, it is like the nerve cells in my body are all connected up and are ready to sprout fantastical inspirations at any time. Once this "state" is disturbed, it is like to stop watering the plants, or to find the air polluted. In time, the plants will wilt due to a lack of nutrition and eventually die a premature death. ∷ I consider myself a wealthy person in terms of my possession of time, because every day I have a full 24 hours and I have at my disposal 1,440 minutes. Yet, I wish to be a miser in spending this providential wealth, to be so miserly as not to waste any single minute. ∷ When a person spends a prolonged period of time alone, whether to draw, read or write, he puts himself in a situation where he needs to face his own inner self. To me, it is akin to walking side by side with death as a companion, for I can feel myself competing with time for my youth at every moment, yet I am powerless in this struggle. I feel small, even insignificant. However, is the fear of the insatiable emptiness the eventual driving force behind all seemingly firm ideals and deeds? I have passed the point of no return in my companionship with solitude, for this is the only prescription to treat the desolation of death. I do not seem to fear death anymore, because I have come to terms with how lowly and weak my life is. So why should I be afraid of a few paintings, or an exhibition? They are merely my spiritual medication. ∷ My attitude towards criticism of my creations is that of indifference. My reason is: at my present stage, my art is like the various parts of an elephant and is yet to be pieced together into the complete "elephant." So it is premature for others to criticize them now. Furthermore, for them to criticize or comment on my art while it is still maturing is akin to the blind men trying to describe what an elephant looks like by groping in the dark. The correct attitude is thus: any criticism or suggestion that enters my left ear will be filtered in my brain; the beneficial remarks will be absorbed, while the rest goes out from my right ear. The important thing is to think for yourself, as the ancient saying goes: You can lead a horse to water, but you cannot make him drink. ∷ In the creation stage of "Flower in the Wind," I basically sought to convey realities by expressing my feelings as they really are. In the creative stage of "Journey to Dreamland," I started to go beyond reality to portray something else, by weaving my thoughts into my works by manipulating forms, lines, colors, spaces and brush strokes. ∷ What is a good painting? I feel that my current creations are still a great distance from works that convey the senses of carefreeness and wonderment. Be it rational knowledge or technical accomplishment, when they are fully absorbed into every cell of my body, they can independently manipulate my emotions. All I have to do is to exercise my vitality naturally. Works that I produce in these moments are then considered my best works! ∷ Whatever we read and the convictions, views and experiences of our forebears, the ancients or any others cannot substitute what we accomplish with our own hands as well as our independent thinking. That said, our forebears' experiences and works can serve as a door or a springboard, through which I can enter into another garden. We must never allow our intuition and feelings be confined by dogmatic, second-hand experiences and the thoughts of others, for otherwise we will die at the doorstep before we can enter our own gardens. ∷ Painting is not easy, more so is to create a good painting. This is because the core of painting is our inner world; most of the time, our feelings or thoughts reflect our inner struggles. The emotions and thoughts in life are insubstantial and invisible, whereas art serves to transform the Subliminal into tangible, visible images and colors. In other words, painting is a portrayal of one's heart (or what the artist has distilled from it). Isn't this challenging? ! ∷ The essence of art is to come out from thin air and yet able to create something out of nothing. To me, inheritance and innovation are like bees making honey. As a honey maker, I produce the "honey from a hundred flowers," while the accomplishments of my forebears are the gardens with a hundred blossoms or like the twinkling stars in the sky. As industrious as the honeybees, I work hard to collect the pollens of inspiration according to my preference from among the multitude of dazzling blossoms, and ferment them in my own "honey comb" to produce my unique concoction of my "honey from a hundred flowers." ∷ At my current stage, I need to return to the issue of the purified nature of art. This purity refers to how the various elements of the painting can be portrayed in their pure form as well as the personality strength and spiritual direction implied by these elements. ∷ Be it people, plants, animals or everyday life, they fall "prey" to my brush and become expressions of life. Whether dynamic or static, I strive to imbue them with the thoughts and feelings of life, the rhythm of music, the abstract language of dance and the excitement of games. I see them all as the spiritual strokes of art. ∷ The weapon that can most successfully stifle an artist is perhaps the craving for fame and public recognition. This is because the allure of art is only in the art itself. Art conveys thoughts, but not to be burdened by it. They are totally different matters. ∷ Only when one can stand solitude before he can uphold the simplicity of art. Solitude conjures up the images of a deserted mountain, a flower blooming beside a stream, a crescent moon shining coldly from high in the sky. We should hold a conviction towards art, so that we can be simpler, less adulterated. ∷ The process of painting has a far greater effect on me than the final outcome of the work. Let me give you an analogy: parents give birth to their children, raise them, and grow with them. This process of interaction has a greater impact on the parents' life than when the children leaving home when they are grown. When grown-up children enter the society, they will have their own destinies; what is left in the hearts of the parents are mostly a deep longing and concern for them. In the past, I was more concerned about the final outcome of my work than the process. Now, the process of painting truly grows along with me; it has become a record or symbol of my growth and a journey of my thoughts. This form of creating process has almost become the entirety of my personal meaning of painting, and the moment when my work is finally completed (just assume it so), it is to me the "my child is an adult now, and he is starting his own life" moment. At that moment, I have only one thing left to do for this child that I created myself, and that is to let go, remember and savor. ∷ We have many concerns in reality, and our emotions and thinking change unpredictably. If I were to continue creating using the "Flower in the Wind" approach, it would entail locking down my thoughts, feelings, perception and illusion in the corresponding state; this would become an emotional torment to current state. Only when I allow my emotions and thoughts to change and develop, I could blend them onto the tapestry of lines and colors; when I allow nature to unfurl, I can create with ease. Sudden emotions and crises of the soul are the reasons for painting. ∷ In this age of information explosion and mounting multi-cultural tension, we as individuals can either choose to change, adapt and experience, or we can also choose to retreat and fortify. Whichever attitude we choose is the result of reasoning. What is important is we must be happy with our decision. For now, I am firmly entrenched in the traditional hand-painting camp, observing the changes and developments around me, and allowing what I see to indirectly influence what I paint eventually. Perhaps all the phenomena, people and objects will become the "prey" of my brush. Think about it; how much fun and exciting this life of a painter can be! ∷ On the whole, I paint very slowly, and it boils down to the fact that I use my "heart" too much. Almost every one of my paintings have lived, changed and experienced ups and downs together with my heart. I could not allow my brushes to become detached from my inner feelings and move for other reasons. My brushes obey my heart, which is sometimes turbulent, sometimes quiet. ∷ Oil painting, color ink, Chinese painting, graffiti, and line drawing — they are derived from the same strain and differ only on the techniques and presentation. In selecting their subjects, they are neither contrived nor intentional; they stress on allowing the process to be nature, including constraining what needs to be constrained, and leaving what is subtle and ordinary to remain as it is. In creating these paintings, the artist's heart is guided by life, and his brush and ink are guided by his heart. ∷ What is the true meaning of painter? I believe it is to paint happily, live life truthfully and ,with unadulterated soul and a wise brain. Painting is one of my games. Confucius taught us to "enjoy arts," which in plain language means to "play" or 'have fun." However, this form of playing is not a waste of time or emotions, and it needs to be done intelligently. Examples of intelligent play includes painting, IT engineering, pastry making, becoming a wildlife expert, designer, dancer, farmer, even housewife. So long as you take playing seriously, you will derive much pleasure. Art has made me realize that painting should be sincere and happy. It no longer matters if it is arduous or tiring, or that I am poor. Why? Because I am having so much fun! Our life shortens day by day, and I must enjoy my life while it lasts. How am I going to enjoy it? Painting, reading, thinking and living. ∷ I keep a little notebook that chronicles the process of my search: not only the sketches of my life, but also the recollections of my life experiences, dictations of my flights of imagination, and also drafts of my unformed abstractions that my deep-seated urge wishes to express. These records serve to consolidate my musings into a formal language and contextualize them into a variety of content and subjects. ∷ Live as brilliantly as a flower in summer, depart with the quiet beauty of autumn leaves. I respect and love those artists who do not care about glory and gains, nor universal fame and fortune, but to "consume" themselves for their dreams—burning their own lives in exchange for a value that is unappreciated in the real world—and who uphold their belief in “dedication.” They are not afraid of being looked down, and are only concerned about their free-spirited flight in their own idealized kingdom. ∷ Support your spirit with ideals and beliefs; look upon the people and occurrence around you with peace and tolerance; apply your knowledge and skills to improve your life; use reason and judgment to avert those crises in your life; win over the love and friendship of others by exercising initiative and caring; use passion and perseverance to accomplish your dreams; correct your shortcomings harshly and dispassionately. ∷ Cleanse yourselves, enrich your inner world, melt away techniques, let your works exude an unforgettable charisma, let every line, every color, speak of the hope in your heart. Focus all your passion and strength in your painting, for this patch of "land" is real, honest, fertile, promising, and worthy of your devotion to cultivate it. Purify yourself, be dedicated every step of the way, and pursue art in its purity to the extreme. ∷ Peking Opera and Kunqu Opera combine poetry, singing, dance, drama, and costume into one art form. My attempts at painting the operas and dances are not portraits on history or anecdotes, nor interpretations of the stage plays, but to revive some of the traditional elements from this art form in today's context, and to capture a fleeting impression, a certain charm, and a sense of nostalgia in my painting. 收起